Not Specified
from Minnesota, USA

  • Activity

    • Why can we still not see community updates from videos area...

      1 year ago


      Anyway, I've been a bad community member and not been here. On the one hand, taking a step back and trying new groups elsewhere can be good. On the other, it's always important to keep steady with people you're good with.

      I'm using my chosen name more often and in more places, including with my city council member (I go to his public meetings and take notes about the issues people bring up- mostly NIMBY stuff that's anti- our municipal comprehensive plan) and Twitter. Also, I'm finally getting out of the deli job, including the health issues it created for me, and got into a training program for working in state and local government. Hooray for finally being eventually paid to use my strongest skills!

      Also, I'm getting my wisdom teeth out in a couple months- they should've been out a decade ago, but poverty in America. One's impacted, so they'll also have to remove a "small" piece of my jaw to get it out. I hope it doesn't break...

      And I hope to make it to my city's Pride parade, if I get the day off from work this'll be the first time going with a non-spiritual-based group (once marched with a UU church, they were kinda high-horse about the whole thing). I'll be going with other queer individuals who know who I am, it feels... nice?

      For anyone who actually sees this, how've you all been recently?

    • Never Have I Ever: seen all the way through at least one episode/viewing

      2 years ago


      Game of Thrones.

      Adventure Time.

      Rick and Morty.

      Orange is the New Black.

      Frozen, Moana, Hercules, or most other Disney movies post-1990.

      Wonder Woman, Guardians of the Galaxy vol.2, Thor past the first, Spiderman past the first Tobey Maguire one, Iron Man past the first, Avengers past the first, or any Captain America.

      Harry Potter and either the Half-Blood Prince or the Deathly Hollows (either part).

      Stranger Things.

      Fast and the Furious anything.

      Tron: Legacy.

      Any of the Marvel tv shows.

      Arrested Development.

      It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

      Better Call Saul.

      Any of the Godfather movies.

      The Sopranos.

      All Quiet on the Western Front.

      House of Cards.

      Band of Brothers.

      Flight of the Conchords.

      Legend of Korra.

      The Office, either UK or US versions.

      Parks and Recreation.

      Attack on Titan.

      Boku no Hero Academia.

      Kill la Kill.

      Yu Yu Hakusho.

      Gundam anything.

      Dragon Ball anything.

      Naruto past the first season.

      Avatar (the movie one).

      Schindler's List.


      Jaws anything.

      Apocalypse Now.

      Usual Suspects.


      The Big Lebowski.

      Die Hard anything.

      True Grit.

      2001: A Space Odyssey or any of the sequels.

      The Jurassic Park series past the second one.

      Any Terminator movie aside from Rise of the Machines.

      Any Hitchcock movie aside from The Birds.

      Castle in the Sky.

      Porco Rosso.

      One Piece.

      Nadia: the Secret of Blue Water.

      Lupin the Third anything.

      Any Michael Myers movie aside from H20.

      Any Jason Voorhees movie aside from Jason X.

      Your references confuse me.

      I'm a horrible media person. Don't expect me to add to the conversation in any meaningful way unless you're looking to know something boring. Or ask me if I've seen something. There's always increasing the list to make you feel better about yourselves.

    • Spot of good news

      2 years ago


      Alongside caretaking and my volunteering duties, I've been looking for some part-time work to help pay bills- and that may just have happened! Haven't gotten a finalized offer, but I had a second interview with an independent grocer in the next neighborhood over and was told to expect a call tomorrow as to when I'll be put on the schedule for training and stuff. If it's for real, this will also mark the first time I've ever worked a union job. It also marks the first time I've ever gotten to tell a place 'no' because I got a job somewhere else; you may be thinking that's a bad idea at this point still, but it was at a liquor store and with my grandma's bad feelings about alcohol (grandpa had been sneaking whisky to deal with his depression and it stopped his meds from working properly before he died)... it's really the good decision.

      Huzzah gainful employment!

    • Update + new tool

      2 years ago


      The arm has fully healed thanks to a week of antibiotics, and I've come to the realization that... Pitivi is seriously bad at everything. Like, it can't/won't apply volume control to video clips, doesn't seem to do layers except as a holding trough for manually-split clips bumped up to the top layer, and it crashed after trying to load a third clip into the project. So I had to put video-editing self-teach on hold- until after today, because today, I was given a second-hand (but still very new to me) laptop, and it's glorious.

      I've had a laptop before, mind you, but only one, and it was a 1st gen notebook, which meant that it was about 14''x16"x2", weighed half a ton, and couldn't do much aside from surf the internet and type Word docs. This one has an Intel i3 (blue), a 17" screen, full keyboard plus ten-key pad, just about 600GB HD, and 6GB of RAM (the current desktop has 1GB and my monitor is... not 17" or 16:9). And I got it to factory reset to Windows 7 without a hitch. It's going through TRON right now to get all the bloatware off it, but after that I'll have a computer that's capable of running an actual editing program without crashing. I'm resolving not to load any games onto it, though, because I have a hard enough time focusing on work-stuff as it is right now. Maybe Civilization someday, or Minecraft, but only once I'm more productive and can legitimize treating myself without jeopardizing my time-management routines.

      Tl;dr: huzzah new laptop!

    • Oof... fallout from cleaning basement

      2 years ago



      Tl;dr- all that cleaning and carrying potentially-health-hazardous garbage out of the basement has given me a skin infection on my arm. Not posting a pic of it, that feels squicky, but I managed to get it checked out and now have antibiotics to take for the next week.

      Still working on teaching myself video editing, and it looks like I'll be trying me hand at a VO audio line, since this cam doesn't have a very good mic (at least how I've managed to set it up so far). I'll release when it's done and I manage to set up a YT channel.

    • First projects: chosen!

      2 years ago


      Quick check-in!

      With all the interesting STUFF I keep coming across, and the desperate need for being able to get things repaired or created (okay, that second one is just desire), first things first- renovate grandpa's basement workshop. It has a tool library, shop-vac, and multiple lights and outlets. But there's so much crammed into it as to almost render the area NSFW, but like in the OSHA way (not to mention all the decades-old dust and really old, retro bits and pieces- I could make a robot cosplay...). I'm thinking put together a little thing for it to learn Pitivi editing. It'll also become a main space for me making things/potential content.

      Also, my first doc'ed DIY will be... a spinning wheel. As in for making yarn. I've found just about all the components I could possibly need for it, including a bike wheel from out in the garage. There are seven(!) bikes out there, only three being used, and I'm pretty sure grandma's past rolling outside of a walker. There will almost certainly be physics talk in covering this project, but I promise to keep that to a 7th-grade vocabulary as is possible. 

      Also also, I officially found a win in a forgotten attic closet. If you got it, flaunt it!


    • What does the internet want?

      2 years ago


      For a good while, I've wanted to try making posts about interesting/original stuff, but never got much feedback on the bits I actually uploaded. At the present moment, things are kind of in flux (both online and IRL), and I again feel the urge to give things a shot. But not knowing what people would actually be interested in viewing/interacting with is a tough spot to be in, and since I don't have any gaming equipment, I guess I'm asking the people who read this.

      What would you be interested in, if I were to try doing some form of content?

    • Acceptance, and a guide to Asexuality

      2 years ago


      I've been trying to become more socially 'out there' since the start of this year (a bit difficult for a confirmed introvert), and after over a month of mental-regrouping, I went back at it this week. Today on Twitter, I saw a retweet by one of our lovely community members of a meme about orientation and inclusivity... and almost immediately felt bad about where the resulting thread had gone without him intending it to.

      Without going into these people's details, some users, both openly LGBT, decided to speak ill of inclusivity towards asexuality, which is recognized within the LGBTQIA community. to quote: "They just love to pretend they're oppressed for not wanting sex," "Cishet aces should be glad," "it burns me up when people try to make specifically LGBT things all-inclusive," and "I have nothing against ace people, but there is a line of respect due." Two people on the internet speaking in such a way as to make myself- and I would definitely assume others, should they come across these comments- feel shame for wanting the same thing they do: being acknowledged and recognized as acceptable.

      As an asexual, first I would like to make one thing very clear which might not be: libido and orientation are two very different things. Orientation is what most people are familiar with: the idea that a person is attracted to one or more types of being, the most simply understood/accepted labels being straight, gay/lesbian, and bisexual. Libido is the term one could more commonly call sexual appetite or sex drive: how often you want sex, how much you like it, and how much/what type you need to satisfy your desires. To illustrate: taking Prozac won't make you gay/straight if you're the other way around, but it does have a common side effect of lowering your libido due to messing with your serotonin levels. A young adult could be cold on sex until they discover kink or vibrators. 'Cishet' does not apply to an asexual person in the way the Twitter user above meant in their denial: the 'het' part is already out the window by merit of describing a different orientation altogether (heterosexuality). As for the 'cis' part, many asexuals are cisgender, but that's not the rule- transgender and non-gendered individuals can be asexual just the same.

      There are, yes, quite a lot of asexual people who have low or virtually non-existent libidos, but it's neither universal nor one of the requirements. In fact, there are some asexuals who quite enjoy the act of sex; myself, I'm toward the other extreme. What makes someone asexual is the fact that they aren't sexually attracted to any type of person. It is generally understood that one does not need to be attracted to someone in order to have sex with them, and that is just as true for asexuals who go through sex for the sake of a partner in order to give them what they want or expect from the relationship.

      My own experience put simply, I never have/will never want to chat up or get into a relationship with someone in order to have sex. I never have/will never have to change panties from the experience of another person, save after getting pushed into a pool unexpectedly. I never have/will never have the desire-to-have-sex-with-someone driven by a personal, social, or physical trait. I have never been sexually attracted to anyone, male or female- including the short string of boyfriends who took it upon themselves to pursue me. Had I not been taught to hate myself for being born female in a fundamentalist Christian group, I might've had the courage to stay single.

      And here's where it hits home, as any LGBTQIA community member will recognize: 

      - "I'll bet you're not really ____, you just haven't met the right person/had a good partner/tried hard enough. Here, let me prove it to you..."
      - "You're not ____, you just think I'm ugly/a bitch/an asshole/you're better than me. You just want to hurt me by saying these things. How could you do this to me?!"
      - "You're not ____, you're just looking for attention/going through a phase. When you come back to your senses, here's my number/I'll accept your apology."

      Did you add the word lesbian, gay, bi, trans, or queer for it to make sense? These lines work the exact same for 'asexual', but, and this is a very important but, we get it from everyone, straight and LGBT. We have been made to hide a lack of attraction for fear of derision, attacks for not being considered a truly existing orientation, and misguided attempts at 'fixing'. So, a common defense mechanism many of us use is to fake another orientation, or to simply avoid dating and/or social environments altogether, to stave off harassment- but then comes the self-hate at denying one's being, and the fallout when/if the truth arises. Sound familiar...?

      So No. It's literally not you, it's me. It's not an insult, I'm seriously just not into that. And yet it's almost universally taken as an insult. Sex has become such a part of our identities here in the West that a rejection, for whatever reason, can be dangerous- and those who accept no invitations are assumed to be either sick or hiding something, perhaps their sadistic glee at insulting pursuers. No. It's literally not you, it's me. I'm not into you or anyone else. And no, it's not a medical or psychological condition or defect; I feel perfectly fine the way I am, and it has no negative effects on my home or work life. This is normal for me. Someday, I hope it can be as okay as being just about anything else.

      I fully respect other members of the community who've gone before me (starting with my aunt and uncles) and are here now as well, but at this particular moment I am made to feel unwelcome being alongside or even looking up to them. They've heard it all before, they've fought the good fight and continue to fight it, they've won their ground, but at this moment I am made to feel unwelcome having anything to do with the effort to make the world better and safer for all. Why is it okay to turn around and throw the exact same slurs used by homophobes at a much smaller, objectively less vocal group that gets them from those same homophobes as well? What purpose of solidarity does that serve, to finally approach a safe place for anyone to be with/love/have sex with whomever they want, but to shun and ridicule those who would prefer to simply be on the sidelines and accepting/accepted? We're all in this together, and wonderful things happen when all types are able to contribute. And yes, we want to. We're just quieter about it.

      I am made to feel unwelcome for this moment on the internet, all because of two people trying to make themselves feel bigger by belittling others. But only for a moment. Because I recognize that their words are simply a sign that they have their own insecurities about who they are or want to be, making them just like everyone else in this world, including myself- they just chose to, sadly, express those insecurities in a certainly hurtful and possibly harmful way. This moment will pass, others will- and indeed already have begun to- speak out against their comments, and I will try again to feel welcome and to engage.

      For those looking for some easily accessible, reputable sources on this topic, I would highly recommend starting your search with a visit to AVEN (the Asexual Visibility and Education Network) at, or by going to BBC and searching their well-written set of articles under 'asexuality'. If you've made it all the way down here, thank you so much for reading and I hope the rest of your week goes well.

    • Educational journal attempt #1: the watershed

      2 years ago


      Last month, I asked if anyone would be interested in these, and after cutting my teeth on an article for my neighborhood's seasonal newsletter, I figured I'd try to do one for here- which has a much more... varied audience. I tried to make this internationally translatable so more people could interact with it, and I chose just a working title for now, it could change with feedback. Let me know what you think!

      Water and Us: the Science of Mni Wiconi, Part 1

      With the protests and legal challenges surrounding fracking (hydraulic fracture-mining), drought/flooding issues, and oil transport methods in North America, water-use and hydrology have become more prominent in political talk, but necessarily better-understood in regular conversation. Many people in the US only learn about water in middle- and high-school Earth Science class, and even then only in terms of the 'water cycle', where it's often mixed into weather coursework. But it's so much more than that.

      To start, let's consider our most immediate relationships with water. Environmentally, we deal with two concepts: the watershed (in Europe commonly known as a drainage basin) and the water table. Simply put, the first is the area of land that is drained by a body of water, and the second describes how deep you would normally have to dig a hole before you found standing water (without wading into a stream or lake). Let's look at this first concept a little closer.

      When it comes to a watershed or drainage basin, you live in at least one: yes, they overlap. As a rule of thumb, the further inland you live, the more watersheds you most likely live in. For instance, let's say you lived in Leeds, England. Directly downtown, you're not only in the drainage basin for the River Aire but also the Rivers Ouse and Humber as well; the water under the Neville Street bridge eventually drains into the North Sea, and does so by stages as happens in many other places. In North America, let's pick the little town of Laurelville, Ohio. The nearby Salt Creek (the most local watershed) drains into the Scioto River (the next regional watershed), which drains into the Ohio River (the next-next regional one), which then drains into the Mississippi River (the largest watershed in North America), which finally empties into the Gulf of Mexico at New Orleans. That's a very long distance for that water to travel.

      This overlap of districts makes for some big problems, however. Take the MN Pollution Control Agency's recent survey of the Upper Mississippi River, for instance: nearer the source between Lake Itasca and Grand Rapids, its waters are very clear and great for fishing and recreation, thanks to the protection it gets within several state forests and local Native American reservations. However, further down where the Crow River enters near Dayton, there are significant concentrations of phosphorus, nitrate, silt, and fecal bacteria from unbuffered farms, mining/industrial areas, and erosion. From Dayton to when it exits the Twin Cities region, the Mississippi picks up water from (in turn): the Rum River; Rice, Shingle, Bassett, and Minnehaha Creeks; the Minnesota River; the Pig's Eye Lake system; and finally the St. Croix and Vermillion Rivers- in addition to thousands of unnamed storm-drain pipes and ditches. Both Minneapolis and St. Paul rely on the Mississippi for their drinking water, like hundreds of other towns further downstream.

      That's a lot to take in.

      So why isn't water protection more of a concern? That's a very good question. One idea is that, because it's plentiful and so easy to get, it's easier to forget. Another is business interests: increased environmental protections would assumedly translate into higher costs for companies to do business, which might then translate into higher costs for consumers. Yet another is inconvenience: legislating tougher protections is complicated, expensive, and time-consuming, even if you're not a politician, and your efforts aren't even guaranteed to make any difference (and if you do effect change, you risk it all being reversed by future politicians, as is currently happening with threats to the EPA and MN's Air, Water, and Cultural Legacy Act). Still another is apathy: your family in Arizona isn't affected by the lead pollution in Flint, MI, so why should you care? There are countless others, but none change one simple fact: humans need water to survive.

      If this is something people like, next article I want to touch on the water table and how it works with both the watershed and local soil. Thanks for reading!

    • Personal (Re)Introduction [fair warning: just a little sappy]

      2 years ago


      First off, I would like to thank the people here that I've interacted with and lurked on since I joined a few years back. The encouragement and advice I've received from the people here have gotten me through some really hard times, some of which are still ongoing but easier to handle than had I never gotten to meet and interact with many of you. Like many lurkers on the internet, I'm a diagnostic introvert who hasn't gotten much of a handle on self-sharing. Back when I was doing a daily post, it was almost strictly about music with occasional updates that ended up being generic gripes about bad roommates and stress in the job-hunt routine.

      But where I was previously in life also contributed to this, and in truth it wasn't pretty. To be honest? I'd never thought I'd even be alive for this long- most every message I've received, from family to statistics to fundamentalist Christians, told me I'd be dead by either health risks or suicide by age 25. I'm currently 33 and still have problems with those messages, even though I've removed myself from most of those influences, but I've been working on it. So this is something I would like to change: to be the one directing my story without others' direction or fear of their reactions. With that said, I'd like to give a short (re)introduction, using what I hope will become my legal name later this year.

      *Clearing throat sound*

      Hello! I'm Selby. I'm working toward a career in urban planning, and am currently self-learning (MIT OCW and Duolingo) to brush up on math/computer science, urban studies, and Spanish. My core interests involve civic engagement, cultural architecture, urban ecology, and the creative impacts of poverty on urban life. Currently, I'm volunteering for two nonprofits as a mechanic/go-fer at an open bike shop, and with my neighborhood association as one of their new media/content managers. One challenging thing I'd like to learn is podcasting and properly editing those short educational videos like Minute Physics (but more live-action-oriented), because there are so many interesting aspects of urban life and what goes into making it possible and I want to find some way of sharing that in an easily accessible format.

      I want to give back with what I have; do the things I'm studying/interested in seem interesting to you? Let me know. Have some advice on something here? Let me know. Want feedback or have a question on something weird? Let me know. It will take a while for me to get used to posting more regularly, and getting poked would certainly make sure I do (I hate being non-responsive, I consider it rude), but I want to make the effort.

      And finally, thank you. Just for being here.

      With love,

      Selby Verrar

  • Comments (21)

    • xcalante Sentry The Defiant

      4 years ago

      Hey! Thanks for the add!!!

    • xcalante Sentry The Defiant

      4 years ago

      Hey! Thanks for the add!!!

    • Spartan117qz

      4 years ago

      Gotta love that profile pic.

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        Thanks! Ed is one of my favorite characters.

    • glaberge FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold LaBear

      4 years ago

      Hey! Thanks for being totally awesome and coming and hanging out with us. Hope to see you again soon at the next event.

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        It was amazing getting to meet all of you, I definitely want to make it again! smiley13.gif

    • EatinEtan

      4 years ago

      So I decided I wanted to send someone a warm and fuzzy message that I didn't know yet. I saw your Ed picture and as someone who plans on at least watching the episode "My Funny Valentine" today, I knew that I should send one to you haha. Happy Warm Fuzzies Day! smiley0.gif

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        Such a great episode!

        Hope you had a good Warm Fuzzies Day too smiley12.gifsmiley13.gifsmiley12.gif

    • LUCASthe3RDj That Guy

      4 years ago

      To the lady with all the music!

      Happy Warm Fuzzies Day!


      • CitySelby

        4 years ago


        Happy Warm Fuzzies to you as well smiley7.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley9.gif

    • Raf Raf

      4 years ago

      Thank you for the add, lady! smiley13.gif

      • Raf Raf

        4 years ago

        Awww, thank you! I really appreciate it! smiley12.gif

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        You seem like such a cool person, couldn't help it! Love your artwork smiley12.gifsmiley13.gif

    • Caszie

      4 years ago

      Thank you for the friendship!! :D

      I hope you don't mind me asking, but are you also watching me? :3 I promise this is a good questions and if you aren't I totally understand!

      • Caszie

        4 years ago

        You are the COOLEST!!!!! :D

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        LOL didn't realize I got to be so cool! smiley8.gifsmiley9.gifsmiley13.gif

      • Caszie

        4 years ago

        YOU ARE MY 250 WATCHER!!!!! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! smiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gif

      • CitySelby

        4 years ago

        I watch everyone on my friends list, thanks for accepting! smiley7.gif

    • MANGAKrAfter

      5 years ago

      Your Icon is awesome!

      • MANGAKrAfter

        5 years ago

        Yeah, I love over energetic characters like her XD

      • CitySelby

        5 years ago

        Thanks! Ed's my favorite character from Cowboy Bebop (Spike is a close second). I just like how geeky she is, without even really identifying herself as that- she's a kid who really likes playing with computers and can do cool stuff with them.

  • Questions answered by CitySelby

    Oh man... Ed's such a cool character, too! If I was forced to choose only one, I would have to say her knack for following her curiosity/gut instincts in such an honest way- she went with the flow of the world around her, very rarely made full-on assumptions about anything she came across, and while people wrote her behavior off most every time as her just being a silly kid, she uncovered really important stuff and had fun doing it.

    That, or being best friends with Ein.