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| Signed up: |
6 years ago (5/21/06)
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Last signed in:
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3 years ago
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Total time online:
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3d 15h 20m
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21 year-old male from Manhattan, NY
I play FPSs mostly, and like shotguns very much. Sarge is my favorite character, and pie>cake. Though useless on console, I am proficient (hee hee! I said proficient on the interweb!) on PC. | Latest Post | |
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Canada's Secret Plot
From the lack of news about Canada anywhere, I, for a long time, have made the conclusion that this was due to Canada’s ridiculousness, idiocy, and 5 to 1 ratio of moose, penguins and polar bears to people. However, I realized that this was incorrect. The reason that no news ever is published regarding Canada is because its government enforces a strict press blackout about goingson in the country. Why would this be? It would have to be because they are covering something up. But what? What would they cover up? Canada is a boring country that never does anything, right? Wrong. Let me ask a few questions. First: where do geese migrate for the summer? North. To Canada. And where do they go in the winter? South, the rest of the North American continent. Next: What is the current infectious disease du jour? Bird flu that can be transmitted to humans. So, clearly Canada’s dopey image is simply a cover for what they are really doing: engineering a lethal strain of bird flu. This summer, or perhaps next summer, whenever the strain is ready, they will infect the migrating geese with the virus, before they leave to migrate south. The geese will infect the land through which they migrateâ€the North and South American subcontinents. This disease will then spread to other continents via infected persons traveling by plane to Europe, Asia and Australia. Soon, the entire world will be infected and shortly wiped out by Canada’s lethal influenza strain, because no one saw through their cover up. How, you ask, will the Canadians keep from getting infected themselves? They will simply seal off the underground bunkers in which they live and work, and emerge once the flu has stopped being infectious. But the question is, what will the rest of the world do? Will it realize in time the threat, and take the only sensible measureâ€a blanket air strike on Canada, to prevent global apocalypse? Only time will tell what will happen, but disaster can only be averted if the knowledge of the details of the oncoming disaster starts to spread.
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| Awards | | | | The Goods | | | Name |
David | | Occupation |
Shotgun Maniac | | Birthday |
September 21st, 1990 | | Interests |
Pie fantasy books anything related to Half Life. | | Gamertag |
| | DMAX0'S... | | | Music |
Nirvana Queen Rage Against the Machine Black Sabbath AC/DC | | Movies |
My Cousin Vinny Independence Day The Departed I Robot | | TV Shows |
Seinfeld Mythbusters | | Books |
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (entire series) Sabriel (Garth Nix) Good Omens 1984 |
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