Harry Dresden - Wizard (minor spoilers)
I'm not normally interested in mystery novels, but the Dresden Files changed that in a BIG way. This series may very well be the most hillarious thing ever. Seriously, if you read these books and don't laugh, then there isn't a funny bone in your body.

For those of you who don't know, The Dresden Files is a series of books (and a short lived tv series that was no where NEAR as good) written by Jim Butcher. It stars Harry Dresden, Chicago's only openly practicing Wizard. He's in the friggin' yellow pages, under Wizard. To make matters worse, he's like the black sheep of the wizarding community, so everyone either doesn't like him, doesn't trust him, or just thinks he's a total wacko.

The problem is, Harry really is a wizard. A wise ass, smart mouthing, broke, private detective wizard, to be precise. Issues abound in this series, along with some of the funniest quotes ever. Things like "An errand is getting a tank of gas or picking up a carton of milk or something. It is not getting chased by flying purple pyromaniac gorillas hurling incendiary poo." I am not kidding, they say crap like this all the time. ^////^

Oh, and did I mention, that he got to ride a friggin' Zombie Tyranosaurus Rex into battle durring a storm in the middle of Chicago?

No kidding ^_^

And now I leave you with some of the more memorable quotes from the Dresden Files book series.

Enjoy ^_^

-"Because Thomas is too pretty to die. And because I am too stubborn to die. And most of all because tomorrow is Octoberfest, Butters, and polka will never die!"

-I'd made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters' hearts

-Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face.

-"What did you do?"

"Nothing, never came close, didn't do anything, that's my story and I'm sticking to it," I muttered. "You got that paper cup? Right, then. All we need is a stuffed animal."

He stared at me. "Wh-what did you say?!"

"A stuffed animal, man!" I roared at him. "Don't mess with a wizard while he's wizarding!"

- "Harry, why don't you try something safer like administering suppositories to rabid gorillas."

-"Anybody who lets me ride their dinosaur can call me Carlos."

-"Tequila? are you sure on that one? i thought the base for a love potion was supposed to be champagne."
"champagne, tequila, whats the difference?"
"uh, i'm thinking it's going to get us a, um, sleazier result"

Aaaaand, my personal favorite...

-The drumsticks poked up above the vampire's crushed chest, their ends wrapped in red tinfoil.

The vampire gasped and writhed a little more.

The timer popped out of the turkey.

Everyone stopped to blink at that for a second. I mean, come on. Impaled by a guided frozen turkey missile. Even by the standards of the quasi-immortal creatures of the night, that ain't something you see twice.

Harry Dresden - Wizard (minor spoilers)
I'm not normally interested in mystery novels, but the Dresden Files changed that in a BIG way. This series may very well be the most hillarious thing ever. Seriously, if you read these books and don't laugh, then there isn't a funny bone in your body.

For those of you who don't know, The Dresden Files is a series of books (and a short lived tv series that was no where NEAR as good) written by Jim Butcher. It stars Harry Dresden, Chicago's only openly practicing Wizard. He's in the friggin' yellow pages, under Wizard. To make matters worse, he's like the black sheep of the wizarding community, so everyone either doesn't like him, doesn't trust him, or just thinks he's a total wacko.

The problem is, Harry really is a wizard. A wise ass, smart mouthing, broke, private detective wizard, to be precise. Issues abound in this series, along with some of the funniest quotes ever. Things like "An errand is getting a tank of gas or picking up a carton of milk or something. It is not getting chased by flying purple pyromaniac gorillas hurling incendiary poo." I am not kidding, they say crap like this all the time. ^////^

Oh, and did I mention, that he got to ride a friggin' Zombie Tyranosaurus Rex into battle durring a storm in the middle of Chicago?

No kidding ^_^

And now I leave you with some of the more memorable quotes from the Dresden Files book series.

Enjoy ^_^

-"Because Thomas is too pretty to die. And because I am too stubborn to die. And most of all because tomorrow is Octoberfest, Butters, and polka will never die!"

-I'd made the vampire cry. Great. I felt like a real superhero. Harry Dresden, breaker of monsters' hearts

-Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face.

-"What did you do?"

"Nothing, never came close, didn't do anything, that's my story and I'm sticking to it," I muttered. "You got that paper cup? Right, then. All we need is a stuffed animal."

He stared at me. "Wh-what did you say?!"

"A stuffed animal, man!" I roared at him. "Don't mess with a wizard while he's wizarding!"

- "Harry, why don't you try something safer like administering suppositories to rabid gorillas."

-"Anybody who lets me ride their dinosaur can call me Carlos."

-"Tequila? are you sure on that one? i thought the base for a love potion was supposed to be champagne."
"champagne, tequila, whats the difference?"
"uh, i'm thinking it's going to get us a, um, sleazier result"

Aaaaand, my personal favorite...

-The drumsticks poked up above the vampire's crushed chest, their ends wrapped in red tinfoil.

The vampire gasped and writhed a little more.

The timer popped out of the turkey.

Everyone stopped to blink at that for a second. I mean, come on. Impaled by a guided frozen turkey missile. Even by the standards of the quasi-immortal creatures of the night, that ain't something you see twice.